Zack: I'm impressed.
Steve: Whoa, okay, hold on. This guy is amazing. Is he flexing his robot arm?
Zack: His robot muscles. It took Dr. Light a few tries to get Mega Man right.
Zack: And by "right" I mean Caucasian.
Steve: This guy is way more badass than Mega Man. That little dingus would run around shooting tennis balls. This guy has one of those switchblade combs and he harasses kids at liquor stores to give him cigarettes.
Zack: When he powers up he can throw a greasy hot rod magazine at you and call you bad names in Spanish. It's called Machismo shot.
Steve: You know he's got a couple throwing stars too. Dude like this never leaves the house without a couple shurikens.
Zack: Possibly tucked in those enormous blue Santa boots.
After years of being misunderstood, I had hoped we finally had "our" story. I was wrong.
He had a yellow inflatable tube around his waist, the kind with a comical duck head. There was a tiny fish in one of his hands, and a trident in the other. In the background a squirrel wearing shades was water skiing.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.