Steve: Has anybody seen my goblin? I know I left him around here somewhere.
Zack: Him name is Hopkin invisible goblin.
Steve: Whoa did you find that meme buried next to some trilobites there old man?
Zack: Yeah, the "where is my goblin?" joke was really killing them.
Steve: Because he's invisible, so they would put him down and then forget where they put him.
Zack: Maybe you could diagram it so I know for sure what you mean.
Steve: Whenever you hear that question what super power would you want I always think invisibility for like a second, but then I realize that I like seeing my hands and it would be pretty hard to do stuff like my a picture frame with my hands or make a cat's cradle with some string if my hands are invisible.
Zack: I would like to have the power to fly so that I can fly to a cliff and then jump off the cliff and die.
Steve: You're a very dark person.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.