Lowtax:: "You see our sister around anywhere? We need her for the 11 o'clock dance performance."

Lowtax:: If I was one of those three alluring sexual skeletons, and by god some day I pray I will be, I'd be careful around that tombstone. It seems structurally unsound.

Zack: "Here's your problem right here. That's a weight-bearing epitaph."

Lowtax:: "Gonna' wanna' get that thing checked out by an engineering firm. A SPOOOOOOKY engineering firm."

Zack: The monster mash is getting hotter every year.

Zack: The skeletons were twerking it, the weed smoke was thick, and Frankenstein was doing coke off wolfman's dick.

Lowtax:: "Twerking?" Oh we're all using modern hip words now? Okay 21st century man, what if those skeletons were PLANKING?!?

Zack: Most skeletons do plank. It's the hot ones that twerk.

Lowtax:: What was that thing where you poured milk on your own head?

Lowtax:: That one never really caught on so much.

Zack: I think that's called the nutmeg challenge.

Lowtax:: No, that's when you run down the highway with a can of nutmeg and see how long you can live without dying.

Zack: Really long it turns out. 65 to 70 years.

Lowtax:: No wonder they're so fit and skinny. The nutmeg challenge will solve America's obesity epidemic!

Zack: "Become a skeleton" is the solution to almost all of America's problems.

More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.