Lowtax:: This dude looks like he suddenly became so lazy he just fell over and disintegrated while smoking a pipe and trying to solve a mystery.
Lowtax:: "Can you crack the world's most boring mystery? Are you up to the challenge?" He thought so, and 20 minutes later, bam, he slumped over and fell apart.
Zack: It does have a sudden raygun victim vibe to it.
Lowtax:: "Well you see, I was smoking my pipe and trying to read normal-sized text with a magnifying glass for no real reason, when I suddenly realized I wanted to die. So I did."
Zack: Nobody finishes In Search of Lost Time. Not even a vampire.
Lowtax:: Note the two unlit matches on the left. Memories of innocence lost.
Lowtax:: Also, dude I know you're dead and have major dental issues and all, but seriously putting candles on your Harry Potter books is not a safe idea.
Zack: And with that linen cape. What were you thinking?
Zack: You might as well be reading a propane tank.
Lowtax:: Is the rest of him behind the desk, in back of the books?
Zack: Maybe he was the books.
Zack: Just a head on some books.
Lowtax:: Did his hand detach and fall into a luxurious box?
Zack: He molted in the middle of a chapter from eating too many vitamins.
Lowtax:: This is all coming together now... I see the big picture... and it's just as stupid as the smaller ones.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Youtube user HolkHogan420 has been systematically exposing all of the Illuminati's plans.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.