|Henchman Status Update (3 of 4)|
|The status of FELL ROVER has been changed from ACTIVE to DESTROYED.|
|Name: RVR-270C (DESTROYED)|
Codename(s): FELL ROVER
Join Date: 9-9-86
Primary Role: Roving
Secondary Role: Chopping, drilling, crushing, flash-freezing, sampling, torturing
Specialties: Can detect motion, swears constantly, never afraid to initiate a staring contest, equipped with a gripping hand at ball-height, optional boombox and tape of "World Destruction."
Availability: On Hire (hire)
Average Customer Rating: (rate)
|Circumstance of Contract Liquidation:|
While patrolling the perimeter of the Imaginary Escapes Resort, FELL ROVER detected non-evil movement and sought to investigate. Arriving at the scene FELL ROVER found an abandoned zodiac boat and several SCUBA sets. Relying on his innate ability to track good, FELL ROVER located a six man UNFORCE commando team and a T.E.A.M. agent. Using a mixture of drills and lurching wheelies, FELL ROVER killed all six commandos. He cornered the T.E.A.M. agent and was about to drill through his core when the agent asked FELL ROVER if it was possible to "love hatred." This caused a logic core overflow and (more)
Transgressive author Chuck Palahniuk is here to help with tips and tricks to hacking your life.
Not what I had in mind when I ordered an Italian gondolier. This is literally just a tiny toy. Needless to say, the Italian businessmen were not impressed and I looked like a damn fool. We lost the pizza pie account and will have to lay off half our factory.
Time to applaud the man who applauds in a loop until the end of time.
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