4. Keep Your Socks Together In Balls
If you're like me and you're always missing a sock, here's a quick tip you can learn in just a few minutes of practice. 1) Get two socks. 2) Put one sock in the other sock. 3) Sort of pull the other one up on the first one until they're almost a ball. 4) You'll never mess up your socks. 5) Whenever you need a sock, there are two socks. It's not fancy, but it works. Trust me. Big time saver.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
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