Wait until this sucker divides and migrates!LD_angel8ys: i only got one neck and two boobs
Zack: That is a good point.
Zack: Ah, okay, here we go.
Zack: Get a pen or something. It's pretty long.
LD_angel8ys: ok got it
Zack: It's called CHESTGROW and it starts with a list of things you'll need.
LD_angel8ys: ok ready
Zack: It says you'll need a workspace that includes a hard, flat surface and accurate scales.
LD_angel8ys: i can use the kitchen
Zack: Good. A mortar and pestle.
Zack: I think you can get it at GNC. It's like a bowl and a hammer. In fact, just put down a bowl and a hammer.
I think I saw some similar stuff floating around a garage sale at a wizard's tower.LD_angel8ys: ok
Zack: An alembic.
LD_angel8ys: i dont have that.
Zack: I think that's like a tea kettle. I think that would work.
LD_angel8ys: is that all of them?
Zack: There's like a list of ingredients then. It says, camphor, cinnabar, potash, sulfur, tin, aether, and something called aqua regia.
LD_angel8ys: I don't have any of those.
Zack: Just best-guess it from the spice rack. I think aether means a feather and aqua regia is a fancy word for water.
LD_angel8ys: ohhh ok
Zack: One egg. Going to also need some chicken and a goat. Doesn't say how much.
LD_angel8ys: to eat?
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Our Something Awful ICQ pranks target the worst and most idiotic folks on the Internet. Believe it or not, these ICQ pranks are all - unfortunately - real.