Zack: Hey, baby.
Zack: Game covers just don't hand out boners like this anymore.
Steve: I would totally be cool with what that babe's hair looks like in the morning all stuck to her face with drool.
Zack: I think this might be a barbarian dating sim. "Uggyar, we never go out. What showing at Cyclops Cave?" "Look like Cyclops just open. Want slay seven o'clock show then get bite?"
Steve: Your barbarians sound like cavemen.
Zack: They don't look like they really did much work to kill that cyclops. Maybe they just found him dead like that and decided to pose.
Steve: No way, barbarians are like spiders. They don't mess around with dead things.
Zack: What about dead monsters?
Steve: They might mess around with a dead monster's skeleton, like to get a key inside its skull or gems or something, but only under the assumption that it's magical and could come to life at any moment. Then they would have to fight it.
Zack: What if it was the skeleton of a dead barbarian?
Steve: Barbarian ancestor skeleton? Those are always coming to life. They're basically the number one most dangerous skeleton. Maybe number two behind dragon skeletons, but only barely.
Given our society's obsession with stalking and ridiculing celebrities, it's tempting to seek a life of anonymity. But beware: not being famous has its own hidden costs.
Mass Effect: Andromeda turns its nose up at the original trilogy's rigid morality. It boasts a more nuanced and intellectually compelling shades-of-grey approach in which a heart icon pops up when it's time to tell an alien to take their clothes off.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.