Twitch once penetrated every orifice of a Jack-o-Lantern.

AlmostSmart often wonders what Orson Welles would have been like if domesticated.

foetus66 has the right idea about people who sing songs for no reason. FIRE THEM ALL, I SAY!

AlbertHerring drags a wooden coffin with him to every Wild West town he visits. He keeps his porn in it.

Let us conclude things with this excellent DrakeLake image that sums this theme up pretty darn good.

If you can believe it, and I think you can if you look in your heart (not literally because that would probably require severe body mutilation), you'll find the courage to understand that we are now done for the week. Thanks to the Something Awful Forum Goons as always, because they made these pictures. That's right, people on our forums made these pictures. Amazing how that works out. Thanks for reading and please stop by again next week when I accidentally post recipes by mistake.

And remember, if you want to totally embarrass your wall and make it look like a big loser, be sure to stop by J-List and buy some scary calendars of Asian girls doing ridiculous things for allegedly erotic purposes. Or you can just get one with pictures of sushi, if that's your fancy. Don't be shy sailor, I know what turns you on!

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Photoshop Phriday

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.