There's a brick on my desk right now, and I'm just going to look at that for a while instead. Heyyy, brick.

Oh yes, brick, I have done something different with my hair. Thank you for noticing.

Actually we were thinking about putting stones in around the flowerbed and maybe some bushes near the driveway, but that's a nice thought too, brick.

Ah, but brick, who is to say who is right and who is wrong anymore, what with today's version of morality?

Of course. You're right, like always. I'm glad I can count on you, brick.

Oh AOL, you're the best I've ever had!

I'm sorry, there was nothing we could do.

That's all for right now, but we'll have a bit more from AOL next week. Big ups to xGryph again for that lovely search tool, and thanks to my bros Aron Zomer, Stevens Yeung, Hydrogen, Foomin, Dramascus, AssMasterJohn, Wildfire, Zinco, Flying-Nugs, Propaniac, bhlaab, Marxux, rigamarock, mojo king bee, rapfan90, screwy, Sensurround, The Young Homer, Flying-Wiz, Mike Ryan, Electrius, templar187, Devonaut, AntiEverything, Peefy, and Marduk for scouting out material this week. Also, thanks to everyone who has been sending in AnonIDs to look up, they've been great.

Know of something terrible that could be featured in a future Weekend Web? Please send me a link!

– Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium (@fart)

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.