Maybe a little face-time, a game of hoops, watch a movie, you know.

I had a dream Snoop Dogg came to my house and kept starting fires in the kitchen.

No way man, here, take my wallet.

The queers are getting hitched and kids are reading fantasy books! It's all over, oh lordy, it's alllll over!

All of the letters in NASA are also in Satan. Think about it.

Oh yeah, every brown person on the face of the Earth is always planning to blow something up just to spite the Heavenly Space SuperGod Jesus. When boarding a plane, remember the old saying: If the passengers are brown, stay on the ground. If the passengers are white, have a nice flight!

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2017 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.