eBay

The world's largest auction site is unsurprisingly also home to some of the most inept people on the planet.

YOU INSANE SON OF A BITCH, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??

Yeah, but she never accounts for wind speed or bullet drop.

Are you suggesting that someone on the Internet called little-ol-me might be morbidly obese?!

eBay is the center of flirting expertise.

They must have upped sucker production to every 30 seconds or so.

hng yorslf fom a wndmill LOOLOLOL

Thanks to my forum friends Jaspeh, WHORENDOUS, TerryCheesecake, moana, RoboBlaster, Sgt. Bilco, jackelope, Mighty Stalker, Sliquid, Senator Biscuit, Mantrain, Mandrake Root, tyrseil, Sireg, HAL Capone, Phullish, Pockyless, pcable, Avertist, smearmfish, Matlock, Zeekay and Hypnosia for contributing.

If you know of a forum that would fit in here, or if you have really purty eyes, please email me right away!

– Johnny "Doc Evil" Titanium (@fart)

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    It's true. Grimace is human. God help us, we did our best for him.

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.