I've seen better owl fan fiction.

What if... the Matrix was about owls?

Hey, get that crap off of here. This is owl country!

Businesses put owl statues on their buildings to attract the lucrative "owl fan" demographic.

Special thanks to Qwilla, BleakLewis, TinyFaye, Full Circle, PaisleyOrangutan, Spurite Based, diarrhea for girls, Evil Vin, ryborg, MISS WHITE LADY, screwy, Forest Fuckery, Umilele, Wezzo, dcseankun, Rhinceraptor, Montalvo, Archonic, SamuraiFoochs, Medium Cool, CrumFUNist!, AndrewBK, Strawberry Panda, The Puppet Master, Forum accidents, Blueman654, solana, Captain Arab, JonoT45, most erotic flower, EggingstinFeh, Der Metzgermeister, and A PRIZED MULE!. Goddamn that's a lot of contributers.

– Hassan "Acetone" Mikal

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Get In The God Dang Weight Room, Johnny Manziel!

    Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.

  • Helping Your Real Friends Move

    Helping Your Real Friends Move

    A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.