Not cool man. Cat's don't have the ability to agree with your idiotic requests, therefore you have broken the code of the honorable vampire.
Incoming parent of the year!
Generations from now, we will be known as full of shit.
It's quite simple really. The only way he can cope with cutting himself to let his friend suck his blood, and thus encourage him in his retarded fantasy, is to get shitfaced drunk beforehand.
"Really, Holmes!" I dropped into my seat, shocked. "You are remarkably tall! What are you, six foot six? Six foot eight?"
As the 19th century diver approaches a giant clam, a flash of brilliant golden light flares from within the shell. I emerge in a swirl of bubbles and do the timeless universal underwater hand signals for the following: ZODIAC KILLER, KKK, BLOOD OF YOUTH
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.