My cousin's kid at age 6 or 7 on cats:
There used to be green cats but they turned into plants because they slept too much.
Child - "I want some shoes"
Me - "What kind of shoes?"
Child - "I want some whale shoes"
Me - "Oh, like shoes with whales on them?"
Child - "No, I want shoes like what whales wear"
Nobler Than Lettuce
"I have an Ostrich!"
"Yes. He kicks people. My Ostrich will kick you."
"Yeah. I fly him."
"On a string?"
"Nooooo. I ride him and he flies."
Finding the right hat can feel like walking through a minefield for guys. Did a murderer wear your hat? Was it ruined by bros? Are you just an idiot? Find out with our authoritative ranking of bad hats.
The Amazonians value combat prowess and purity of spirit. By wrestling half naked, they pay homage to both virtues by displaying their battle-forged bodies while preserving as much modesty as their society deems necessary. The gelatin in which they wrestle is symbolic of the fluid nature of battle, a concept the Amazonians call ‘akgor-gra.’
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.