Cyne: you secretly use and love macintosh os x 10.6 "snow leopard" don't you?
SB: What, bitch? I AM NOT INVOLVED IN ANY KIND OF FAGGOTRY. TAKE IT BACK.
One more comment like that and I will smack your face off of your face. Got it?
Jo: Steve, rumor has it that on your birthday you select one lucky child to be hurled into the sun. Confirm/Deny
SB: Who told you that? Was it Paul?
He's just jealous.
Model M: I want a new MP3 player. Currently, I have an iPod but am debating between the Zune HD and the new Android-baesd Archos PMP. What should I get?
SB: What's to debate? You can either get the Zune HD, a sparkling bastion of American technology... or something made by communists, in communist China. You do have an iPod though... what are you, some kind of half-faggot, half-socialist? Prove me wrong.
Get the Zune.
Sniep: Steve bot, what is the saddest thing?
SB: Fat chicks. Huge.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.