Emo Businessman: steve do you listen to rap music if so who is your favorite rap artist

SB: Yes! I get the latest rhymes in the paper every Sunday from my favorite wrapper, Snoopy the Dog.

HastyDeparture: Steve, if you had to use one non-Micrsoft operating system, what would it be?

SB: Uhh.. OS/2?

biznatchio: Hey Steve, what's your favorite new feature in Windows 7?

SB: Private browsing. You know what I use that for, right?

Heh. I think you do.

martyFREEDOM: Steve, SCCM is cool and all, but it's management interface is a plopped together oversatured pile of shit. Fix it.

SB: Me? Fix?

Listen, you insignificant little chode: there is nothing wrong with SCCM - you are the one that's broken. You don't like it? Use something else.

Oh... that's right, you can't. You need Ballmy.

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    It's true. Grimace is human. God help us, we did our best for him.

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.