Here are some people who enjoy punching holes in their clits and ripping out their scrotums. Whoopie, it's the BodyMod forums. I guess it's easy to destroy your body when you're such an ugly person, inside and out.

I hope you like cringing in horror.

These people have the same thought process as those who thought the quick travel feature in Oblivion was a bad idea. Just don't use it! What you're basically saying is that you have no self-control that you cannot refrain from using quick travel or your penis. You have to cut it off. Just leave it alone!

BUT A TONGUE STUD ENHANCES THE EXPERIENCE! That's because the chick with the tongue stud is usually 300 pounds.

Here we go. Now we're getting to the fun stuff.



And here's the eviscerated belly-button.

It costs about $1,600 and your entire self-worth.

But you'll lose your ability to comfortably sprinkle salt!

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

  • The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    ‘Toad coin?’ wondered the traveler as he examined the pebble. It did not look all that different from any other pebble, and certainly nothing like a coin. ‘What manner of coin has no head or tail, and bears no seal or flag? Who backs this toad coin, the toad bank? The toad treasury!?’ The traveler laughed, but the toads croaked sternly back at him.

  • Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Spending $10-15 a day on perishable organic dog food is not a sign of a decadent culture in terminal decline, it's actually real good and worth it.

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.