"I'm thinking about performing surgery on myself with broken beer bottles and rusty garden tools, and I'm scared..."
And just where the hell is the flag for tuberculosis?
Dumb doctors with their oaths and pills and that headlight strapped to their heads. Does that thing even do anything? What a crock, I know better!
Ass, asset. I get it. THIS SHIT IS BANKRUPT.
Why don't these guys just drive around a graveyard for a while? Or find the place they filmed the video for Thriller and see if any of the zombie dancer guys are still hanging around looking for more work.
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
U2 and Apple have conspired to place a U2 album into your music in the year 2014. You own a U2 album. And you can't get rid of it.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.