Most of the training for "astral sparring" consists of listening to the theme from Highlander and closing your eyes. Maybe clenching a fist if you want to really get into it.
You can't just make dimensions willy-nilly! What do you think you are, a string theorist?
DO NOT FLY, GODDAMN IT
It's likely more of a "fetal position while jocks punch me and look through my wallet" kind of thing.
Once I had a dream where I fought Eddie Murphy.
MOOOOOOM GET OUT OF HERE I'M ON THE COMPUTER
This Week on Something Awful...
The Deadliest Snake In The Wild West
Ask any cowboy and they'll tell you: The deadliest snake in the wild west is Lava-Filled Hole Shaped Exactly Like A Cowboy Silhouette
Garfield Cooks Up Trouble is the most offensive and dangerous book I've ever read
Garfield is a poison of bigotry on our culture and I have never been more offended on behalf of people than I am right now.
A Guide to Understanding Ben Garrison's Political Cartoons
Ben Garrison's Cartoons are finally explained!
Not Being Scared By A Person With A Chainsaw!
me, getting my arm hacked off: you moron. chainsaws arent even used in hockey
A Recap Of Every DOTA 2 International Match
(indecipherable yelling as eight heroes stand still in an ankle-deep wavepool)
About This Column
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