Zack: God damn it, Tina! Do you have any idea how hard it is to get replacement headlights for an '87 Escort in primitive reality?
Steve: That looks more like a Delorean.
Steve: Marty, you have to go to the skeleton ape dance and teach them to play electric guitar or you'll never be born.
Zack: "Whatever you do, Marty, don't bang the triceratops. That is your ancient ancestor and you need to set her up with the lemure."
Steve: Primitive reality does look pretty crappy. You've got a lot on your plate to worry about.
Zack: Not to mention what appears to be going on in the background. Dinosaurs did 9/11.
Steve: Holy crap, you're right. That looks like the World Trade Center.
Zack: A second pterodactyl has just crashed into the building.
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.