StudentStudent will indubitably get a Nobel Prize for this awesome, stunning... something.

ampinstein moved 30 units of product today and gets a .002% increase in living wages.

When justice calls, Matthew138 lets the machine pick up.

caucASIAN lives and dies by the words "salsa beard."

Rival has grand plans for Apple Day... if he lives that long.

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  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

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