Steve: That guy shouldn't sit so close to the screen. It's bad for his eyes.
Zack: He needs to back off for more reasons than just eye-strain. I think that top monitor is playing the videotape from The Ring.
Steve: I always wondered if that girl who comes out of the TV would fit through a little TV. Like what if you hooked a VCR up to one of those old pocket TVs. Would she come out of that?
Zack: She probably would, but she'd be really small.
Steve: That's not very scary.
Zack: Maybe after she comes out she would grow like one of those dinosaurs you put in a bowl of water.
Steve: Oh! That IS scary!
BREAKING NOW: a story so dangerous that there are those within our government that might kill to keep it from getting out.
Ma'am, what if I told you I have the miracle of a lifetime right here in this briefcase?
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.