Steve: That guy shouldn't sit so close to the screen. It's bad for his eyes.
Zack: He needs to back off for more reasons than just eye-strain. I think that top monitor is playing the videotape from The Ring.
Steve: I always wondered if that girl who comes out of the TV would fit through a little TV. Like what if you hooked a VCR up to one of those old pocket TVs. Would she come out of that?
Zack: She probably would, but she'd be really small.
Steve: That's not very scary.
Zack: Maybe after she comes out she would grow like one of those dinosaurs you put in a bowl of water.
Steve: Oh! That IS scary!
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.