Make fireworks illegal, they rile my cows!
Gluing my arms together while I'm sleeping is a crime!
If you are getting fat, quit it!
The security guard should not yell at me when I get lost in the mall!
Make birds not chase me!
It's too damn hot!
This Week on Something Awful...
Let's Get Way More Specific With Our Lists of the Top Rich People
Top 10 Billionaires in the World? Most Powerful People in Tech? We've seen lists just like these for decades now. Recent features like Best Billionaires Under 40 have attempted to shake things up by getting more specific, but they need to go even further.
I Cannot Continue to Review Mobile Games for a Network Funded by Vladimir Putin
RT mobile games reviewer Jeff Glukhov quits RT after being forced to give pro-Russian reviews to various iPhone and Android games.
300: Rise of an Empire; Mr. Peabody & Sherman; Nymphomaniac: Volume I; Repentance
Did anybody even want this sequel?
Merlin and the Book of Beasts
James Callis delivers easily the best-worst Merlin performance of the last 500 years.
Recaption New Yorker Cartoons!
These cartoons make a lot more sense now, thanks to these straight-shooting captions from the Goons!
About This Column
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.
Previous Articles
- Ki Sanctuary, IHateButterflies, politicalslugfest, Manscat, and Star Banter
- Deviant Desires, LiveWire, and PoopReport
- AfraidToAsk and DeviantArt
- FAQs.org, Tibia, Rotteneggs, and eBay
- Spread Firefox, ChavScum, The Burn Book, and Aggressive.com
Suggested Articles
What's Hot
Popular Threads
NHL GDT 3/9 -- Short Man Argument Stadium
putin is fucking GAY (potentially nsfw)
Finally we have a phone that self destructs
ITT we are the byobist dogs
Schizophrenic in Florida needs help
I'm pumping some sick iron right now at the gym getting the babes
Office for Windows or Office for Mac: You Decide!
"Satoshi Nakamoto" doxxed, real name Dorian Prentice Satoshi Nakamoto