i open the door fo rthem and then grunt and fart as loud as possible as they're walking in while staring at them in the eyes
"dont go in there"
Dont Bully Me!
and while you do this wave your hand in front of your nose
"let me know if the shooter's still in there"
Pulp Can Move
If it's a door that needs to be pulled, make a big deal of trying to push it open.
Them: I think you have to pull it.
You: I know how to open a door, thanks!
Try to push it a couple more times, then step back and let them open it.
open it, put vaseline on the doorknob, and let it close before they can get in
True And Real
"This doesn't mean I like you." I say, removing my knight's helm.
Good advice: dress for the door you want (drawbridge) instead of the door you have (screen door)
Dont bully me!
hold your hand out and cough suggesting-ly, awaiting a tip
"if you walk out that door, you're never going to see me in your life again. ever."
It needs to consume human tissue! It needs to speak to your manager!
Scourgelord Vilius Mandragore gave a speech from our shattered capital on Friday and we are here to fact check his claims about his million year empire.
Reason 9: Ongoing mechanical issues with the internal Superman 64 fog machine.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.