Grandpa once told me, "There are two kinds of people in this world, those who fart and those..." but I didn't hear the rest because he began to fart a lot so I got out of there.
Do you question the credibility of GrandMasterFarts?!
Fragrant Temptations was good, but doesn't really compare to Southern Vapors.
Take The Brown Baron's word for it, he has 4366 posts in a fart forum.
Then Mom and I wondered why guys don't seem to call me.
There's a warrant out for Mrs Blast's arrest. She's wanted on one count of stealing my heart.
In 5th grade we went on a field trip to this science museum in San Francisco, and before we left I overheard the bus driver tell the teacher that whenever kids get loud he lifts his leg up onto the dash, then moves it back and forth threatening to kick out the windshield, and that shuts the kids up. He ended up doing it a couple times to us and it worked, but when he found out some kid peed himself on the way back the driver did the leg motion the entire rest of the way home. I think it was involuntary.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
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