I HATE YOU PAGE 147
- Oh look, it's a tattooed fetus with glasses, how lovely.
- The sad thing is that it wasn't even Halloween when I took this picture. It was the middle of July. I don't know who the hell this bugeyed cretin is, but that didn't stop me from stealing his coffee table and pissing all over his couch. That table weighed a fucking ton. I got about halfway across the moron's yard when I fell down and passed out because I was sweating like a stuck hog. When I woke up, I was in the creek and my fucking shoes were gone, which really pissed me off because they were the only pair of shoes I own that fit me.
- Ed Nichols (on the left), the grease monkey who spends all day hanging around the Jiffy Lube and trying to get enough spare change to buy a Slurpee. I don't know who the hell the Human Bacon Deposit on the right is, but the guy looks like he's got skin pores big enough to shove hamburgers into.
- If the drinks aren't fruity enough, the limpwristed pansies holding them sure as hell are. Go direct a musical, you Tab-drinking gutterfucks.
- Hank the Bloated Dwarf. Let's see your magic armor protect from a brick smashing against your ugly skull.
- The Conga Line of the Damned moves through town, claiming more and more victims. The dance ends when they reach the gay whorehouse in North Appleton's red light district.