Cliff Yablonski versus The Horrible People
- ATTENTION INTERNET NERDS:
- THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT
- THIS IS WHAT YOU GET
- Yeah I got a comment for you and that 50 gallon tub of Doritos strapped around your waist: stop sweating cake frosting for a couple goddamn minutes and wedge your fat ass outside where you can use your powers for good, like by throwing yourself in front of a speeding cement mixer. Pretend it's full of Frosty mix or some shit, you video game jackoff. I'm gonna hunt you down and break into your house and steal your curtain rods and use them to put on a puppet show inside your ass you bloated volcano of welfare.
- Sir Elf protects the mystic garage from invading trolls. CAN'T LET THEM GET THEIR HANDS ON HIS MAGIC TRANSMISSION FLUID BOTTLE OF +4!!! I want to tear off your ring mail armor and wring your neck you scrawny flailing woodland rodent.
- THE NOSE!!! THE CHINS!!! THEY ARE CREATING A NEW FACE THROUGH THE MIRACLE OF MITOSIS!!!
- Hahaha, "Dicks Unlimited," you're goddamn right.
- No no no you got it all wrong, the MATADOR gets the rose, not the bull.