I Hate You Page 01

This is Eddie the Trombone King. I advised him to get some ass cream before that pasty ass rash spread to the rest of his body, but then I realized that was his face. I hate him and wish he dies.
Hahaha, Sarah the Gothic Pig and Frank the Gothic Janitor get married after watching Robert Smith's last concert on Betamax. The wine is embalming fluid. I think all goths are idiots and I'd like to break their necks. These two are no exception.
This is Dancing Weenie. Dancing Weenie busts a move while his friend attempts to shove an entire horseshoe into her mouth. One day she'll reach her dream of having a head that looks like a football, but until then she'll have to settle for dancing with some fuckhead who likes showing off his beautiful ribcage.
Some couple in East Appleton. A couple of what, I don't know. Who's the man in the family?!? No seriously, I can't tell.
BECAUSE ALL THE HUMANS ASKED FOR $40 BEFORE THEY LET ME KISS THEM. ARNOLD THE DOG MOLESTER LIVES DOWN THE STREET FROM DENNY'S.
Hooray! The winner is crowned in the "Who Wants to Be a Fucking Dork?" gameshow.