I HATE YOU PAGE 87

Kevin Volkov's mugshot is proof demonstrating that soliciting horses is still very illegal in Appleton City.

Cake Commando prepares for war! Take no victims, only pastries!

Phone sex and a gallon of Keopectate in a paper bag. The idiots in North Appleton really know how to party.

Shit floats.

The South Appleton Flab Olympics. Sarah Burton attempts to hurdle over the first obstacle but gets weighed down by her sheer, unholy ugliness. Oh yeah, and the extra 700 pounds of tapioca flowing through her ventricals.

Redneck humor. Not pictured: redneck magic, which includes making the cigerette "disappear".